hatred

i know you hate me the way i hate you. The unspoken words that we used to aggregate each days already narrowing my heart to accept you back. Right now, i am so really tired of our drama. You used to like me whenever you are desperate for some help and vice versa. But i do hate myself for letting my heart bekindled by your one moment kindness. Right after, you'll disappear again, making me miserable. It's a total fact that you and me would never make a good combination in any aspect. Why don't you just leave me alone instead of using me as your puppet. I really wish i have the courage to yell at you of how much i hate you! How much you had resented me. How i wish i never meet you all my life T.T.

O God, do help me to be freed from this kind of feeling. How do i hate myself for hating others. But i don't think i could take this anymore. In any moment, i'm afraid i would follow the devils. Nauzubillah.